Life, Fiber, Books and All











{December 2, 2008}   You would be Surprised…..

You would be surprised by the idiocy of some. No, seriously. People are soooo dumb, its hard to believe.

 

For example, on my way home I come down a hill and then go strsight for a while and then I come to a curve. Now, I have three choices there. I can go left (and soon get home), I can go right (and go on a very long 7 mile round about way home) or I can go straigh, and drive into a house. Infront of the house there is a brand new bright yellow flourescent sign with a double ended arrow pointing left and right. Why you really need a sign there telling you you have to go left or right instead of driving into a house is beside me. Personally I would rather see that money go to repairing a few pot holes. But apparently it is more imporant to tell idiots to turn and not drive into a house. And after all, I know the house has stood for 150 odd years, and it hasn’t been driven into yet, so of course some idiot needs the sign to tell them not to drive into it now.

 

Another thing is, apparently people forget how to park after its snowed. I know some people get all excited when it snows, and they are so happy and joyful and sickening. Other people get all grumpy and bumpy and gloomy and refuse to move for fear the snow will invade inside and they will slip and break a hip.

I LOVE snow. I like it, I can’t stand walking in it or driving in it, or being cold because of it. But otherwise I LOVE snow. Its so pretty and soft and white and sparkly and I just love it. Just keep it on the other side of the fence. I also don’t like driving it it. Keep it on the sides of the road, and give me at least two of those nice bone dry gray strips to drive it, or better yet give me a whole road of dry so I can put cruise control on. I LOVE cruise control!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, people are idiots in the snow, some people are afraid to be out driving so they go so slow they literally become a danger. Other people ignore the snow and go so fast they are also a danger (they always are, but the snow makes them more so). I know some men, and probubly women, who will brush off their whole vehicle, except where the liscense plate is. Then they will speed, and cut corners, and ignore traffic laws and signs because they know no one can see what they liscense plate number is.

And, apparently because it is snowy and no one had plowed the parking lot it is okay to park whereever you want. And by wherever you want I mean, following the handicapped and no parking signs (which are painted on the ground, which you cannot see) but taking up two or three spots with your tiny car. Literall, I saw lots of free room in the parking lot (a small parking lot, which services the four busyest buildings), however none of the room would fit more then a motorcycle. People were ignoring the lines and the space and just parking where ever they felt like. I personally parked in the first spot I could find (in this parking lot you aren’t picky, you just park). I knew I could fit there, and I did. I parked wonderfully, not hitting either car on either side of me, or the one infront of me. Then I tried to get out, OOPS. I couldn’t fit out the door.

My car door could open approximatly 2 inches, unfortunatly I am wider then 2 inches, and so is my bag with books. So I had to pull out and find another spot, and I was very tempted to just swipe the two cars. (they had again parked so stupidly, taking up enough space for 5 cars between the two of them). And trolled slowly looking for a parking spot. And I did find one after 5 minutes, in the very back. And of course then I had to walk throught the slush to the door. I, silly me, am wearing very good green sneakers. They are awesome for the summer. Unfortunatly they have holes in the sides, perfect for letting air flow freely, or slush flow through. My feet were literally soaking in icy cold slush by the time I got inside. And now, about 5 hours later my feet are freezing cold and still very wet. I do NTO look forward to going back outside to the slush. Although I am absolutly going to find my winter shoes. Big and cluncky and not nice looking, but warm and mostly water proof.

 

People are so dumb! And I know that I am constantly amazed by it. But still, how can you be so dumb???????? Really, I know that talking on your cell phone while driving is imporant, even if it is illegal. But so is actually stopping for a red light instead of sailing through it (while traffice is using the intersection). *kisses breaks*.

Seriously! Try getting a brain transplant or something. I cannot watch out for you and stop you from byeing or getting injured to a stupid mistake. I refuse to babysit anyone, okay I refuse to babysite adults. And really, as a tutor in a college I find thats what I have to do. And frankly I don’t. Which probubly makes me a bad tutor, but I don’t care.

 

GET BRAINS PEOPLE! LEARN HOW TO USE THEM PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Idiot- the worst curse in the world, according to me.

idiocy- what an idiot is.

 

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On another note, I finished “Between Silk and Cynide”

 

It was very, very good. And highly enjoyable. And when I am home and have the book I will finish my reveiw. Until then, I still highly recomend it. At the same time I will warn you at the very end it becomes much sadder. You learn what happened to agen’s Leo Mark’s was worried about, and it is truely terrible. I have always known that people died, and how some of them died. But never before have I been so invested in them, never before has it stuck me so much. I don’t know if that is because it was an adult book and I am an adult, if Leo Marks was such a strong and incredible writer, or because of some off phase of the moon.

I do know that it has renewed an interest in WW II, and interest I have had since I was about 12 years old. But with classes and stress the way they are now I don’t knwo if I will actually be able to find anything to read, or if I will want to. Now I just want fun, interesting, somewhat light, and occasionally uplifting books. AKA, I don’t want anything too serious or depressing. Life and life and lfie are too serious and depressing at the moment, I really hate to take on any from someone else.

 

-Guin



I really wish I knew, ’cause then I could blame things on “fate” or whatever.

When I was younger I was really sick for a long time, and that changed everything completely. Now, its not like I was diagnosed with some illness and it was life changing and all. It happened gradually. And I happened to fall into a compeltely different path. I went from being someone who expected to go to a great school somewhere out of state, and do fantastic things.

And, not I’ve gone to a private college *one class*, a community college *1 year* and now a state college *This is my second year here*. And I plan to attend another state college and get a degree in plant biology.

I *was* going to major in art and be an art teacher. Or maybe fufill my real dream and be a dancer or actress.

Do you see the complete difference of reality?

Yah, me too!

And yah, maybe I would have ended up doing biology before, but some how I doubt it. And I know that I won’t do the whole actress/dancer thing. And the whole art teacher is unlikely. Sure, I’d still love those things. But I’m not sure that teaching art would give me the same joy it would have before.

Did life make me who I am? Did it do the whole complete change of reality? Or did I make life what it is. Did my passivity, or past, or whatever make life into this complete antithesis?

 

I really want to know, did I make my life? Or did my life make me?

 

Yes, you can get into the whole “nature or nurture”, which is probubly the exact same question. But it doesn’t fit.



{May 12, 2008}   Vacation!!!!!!!!!!

So, very simply put I’m on vacation!!!!!!!!!!

 

I finished up classes this last Wensday and feel so light, fluffy and relaxed!!!!!! Its amazing, never before have I really been burned out from school, I’ve never really wanted to end school and just stop. So, I spent Thursday just sleeping and fooling around, and then going off to a spinning group. Unfortuantly the spinning group is moving to wensday and I’m going to have classes on wensday.

 

I’m not sure how I feel about having school during the summer. I know that I need to be around people and do something constructive as I tend to get worse when I’m by myself doing just fun stuff. And I know that I’ll enjoy the classes as Susan Baker will b teaching it, and chemistry should be fun. But it is during the summer, and I doubt that the school has air conditioning. At least in the older building (where I’ll have class). After chemistry ends I’ll start the second summer session and do US History II.

Everyone thinks I’m insane. Chemistry apparently freaks people out. They’re all scared of it, and they all haed it in high school, and did I meantion that they’re all scared of it? Oh, and everyone seems to have US History as well. So who knows………..

Anyway, I’ll have this week off before starting classes on the 19th of May. I’ve also signed up for classes for the fall. A math class, physics, advanced technical writting and American Sign Language I. I’m hoping I’ll ahev a bit of a head start with ASL because I went to a camp for deaf people when I was younger and we had to learn ASL. I’m also hoping I’ll be much better at reading peopels signs, I could do them just fine. I just had trouble reading what they said.

I got braces this last Tuesday, and of course by Friday I had managed to break one of them. So I’ll have to stop by the orthidontist on Monday and get it reglued. I’ll also need to stop by the hospital and have blood drawn for a test. Of course the blood test requires that you fast so no eating before going in. And because I know I’ll get a really disgusting mouth if I eat before having the brace fixed I won’t eat before then either.

I also have a dentist apointment on Monday, so fun. And I plan on driving to Augusta to get my books for the summer sessions as well as see if the portfolios I dropped off for the teachers to grade have been graded.

I’m going to go looking for a new spinning group to find this week as well, so hopefully I’ll find a few that might work.

Yesterday I spent alot of the day washing fleeces. I washed the pound of Rambouillet from Homestead Wool and Gift Farm. And that was so fun and nice!!!! I love how clean and fresh and nice their fleeces and fiebrs are!!! (I also got a pound of washed white cotswold locks, a pound of washed border lanchester, and 8oz of washed white Randy McNair romney (soooo soft!). The pound of raw Jacob was accidentally left out of the package so their sending that.

Yesterday I also finally got the one pound of Rambouillet  I purchased off ebay from  ita-kk. Its fithy and I did multiple washes to try and get it clean, it also took forever to get here. So I am defintily telling them my expirience and that I am very, VERYdisapointed.

Speaking of disapointed I also was totally honest on my teacher and class reveiw and even signed the comment section so it will be in their permananet records. I didn’t last semsester with my worst teacher and I so regreted it!!!!!!!!



{April 18, 2008}   I’ve hid the Dead Ducks

I’ve hid the dead ducks!

 

In the drawing classroom their are two dead and stuffed ducks on the shelves “full” of still life objects (read, no still life objects. Almost nothing actually). They’re very bald- ie most of the feathers have either been plucked off or have fallen out- totally gross and B-cat apparently loves to have us draw them. Oh, and they are also preserved with arsnic, a very deadly  poison. How lovely!

 

Well, I am sick of drawing them! Everyone else in the class is sick of drawing them! And they have been there for well over 20 years! They’re evil! And last class wehn we were leaving Ama (very nice tall girl, friend. Also in 2-d design) and I really stuggles with not tossing those damn ducks out the door into a snow bank.

I’m just too nice to break them, or ruin them. Although I REALLY wanted to! And I dreamed about shoving them into the trash can, but I just couldn’t really bring myself to do it. (pluss someone would have found them when they changed the garbage).

I also thought about bring some plastic bags, stuffing the ducks int othe bags and brining them homne to burn or trash. This was stopped by the fact I didn’t want them inside my lovely car.

So, I hid them. They are hidden in an empty drawer, at the bottom of a set of drawers and cupboards. The drawer was labeled with something (I think a professors name), but it was empty. So I shoved those damn dead ducks into that drawer, moved back the load of packages, boxes, furnature and like that was infront of it and became increadibly happy. (Of course I also srubbed my hands until they were red).

I also found the very nasty little bubble vase which he loves to have us draw and hid them behind a load of boxes, however it didn’t join the ducks as class had almsot started and people were coming in.

 So, on the school front: I have a million large projects that all of my professors have suddenly decided were a good idea for us to do at the last minute~ I HATE school!!!!!! Evil!

Drawing: B-cat is eveil and stupid. According to a past drawing student I met he even admited the last class that he cannot draw. Which explains why he never shows us how to do anything, gives us demonstrations or help. But that doesn’t explain why he TEACHES a DRAWING class! And why he always tells people their work is terrible or junk or all wrong. But neevr explains why its terrible, junk or all wrong. And apparently I’m his new favorite person to do this too. The guy he was doing this too has started skipping class. And oh, guess what, I skipped last class to. However it was only a trip to an art museum where B-cat was having an exibit. I was NOT going to listen to himself talk about how great his work is, how great he is and all that SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!! It also explains why he has absolutly no concept of how long something takes. He says soemthing only takes a three hours max, I end up spending Friday, Saterday and Sunday doing the projects!

The project he literally gave us no instructions on and keeps refering to as terrible, all wrong and all that shit. Of course everyone else in the class thinks its the best one. And I’m one of the 5 people (now) who actually did it. It is a “collage” of blacks, whties and grey’s ripped fom magazines (or bought paper in my case) glued together to create the collage:

 

collage still life/black and white

See, its dumb and stupid but it actually looks liek the still life. Everyone elses was just a grey mass, if they did it.

The last project we had for drawing was do do a still life (another one *groan*) in either stippling or cross hatching. Now, I had origionally planned on doing mine in cross hatching but Pat (the wonderful amazing and talented art teacher I have had since I was 7 years old) convinced me that stippling would be easer.

For those who do not know what stippling is, it is also known as pointalism. Bascially it is going “tatatatatatat” on a piece of paper with your pen. Where you want black you do that alot, grey for a while, and white you don’t dot at all. I have personally gone through 4 pens with stippling. I HATE it! And its an annoying and terrible sound. Again of course B-cat went on and on how terrible it was, how wrong it was and all that. Again, other students though it was great, I spend 3 DAY working on it, it actually looked like the still life, and I was one of the few people to actually do it.

Don’t mind the yellow or unfocused ness. It was the best pic. Also ignore the fact that shadows go in different directions. I relyd on the light from windows nad that naturally varied as time passed from 11am to 11pm.

2-D design is a much betetr class. But alot of time where we just go over the same thing, too much inclass work time (I’d rather work at home where I actually have space to work. We’re not in an art room. Where in a very small classroom with micro sized tables), and basically its a dull class. But the professor Hellane, is very nice, and the students are nice na dI have some friends. Which totally makes a difference.

One of our last assignments was to make a load of color swatches on watercolor paper with guache. I just love mixing colors so it was fun, and rather mindless. I took a rather scientific approach to it. I systematically worked through each color combination possible (with just two colors), and then some of the combinations possible with three colors. Now, the other thing was I misread the insrtuctions, and I was a little bit “off”. But I had time to correct that.

I cut out tear drops (easy to cut out, and they showed the color well.), and then grouped them by color. I played with how to place them on the black foam core. But i nthe end I ended up creating “flowers” with 5 of the “tears” for petals. I grouped them like I would for a color wheel. The middle flower in yellow to orange. Then I also grouped them so they made circles (kind of liek the color wheel was spiriling outward). So it went from yellow-ornage-pinky red-red-pruple/red-purple-violet-purple/blue-blue-tealish-tourquoise-blue/green-green-greeny/brown-browns-grey-black. Not exactly a color wheel, but close eneough.  I also cut out circles from watercolor paper I had painted black with Indea ink and glued those circles onto the center of the flowers. Partially to make them work better together as a whole, and partially because some fo the flower centers weren’t as net as I had meant them to do. Best nes is this was my best project yet according to the teacher! I actually got an A!!!!!!!!!!

Don’t mind the fact that its pre cutting into a pentagon shape (with at least a 1 inch baorder all around) and that its also sideways and onto of a bunch of junk.

 I’d show you one of the other two projects I just finished because it just looks so cool. Unfortunatly my Dad stole them and took them to decorate his office before I managed to take a pic or 5.

On the Fiber front I got a large and packed full package from Sandy of  [Homestead Woll and Gift Farm] (http://www.homesteadwoolandgiftfarm.com/). Which is very exciting! Yesterday when I should have been at the museum I actually packaged and labled all fo the fiber. I had hoped the weigh them and and record them and photo them. But the good camera is dead and the scale needs new batteries (I can get it to work for about 30 seconds by rubbing the batteries on my shirt and replacing them). So Bacially I just repackaged them into closable plastic bags and labled the bags.

I also started to repackaged and weigh out the medical cotton roving I purchased from an ebay seller. Again the scale and the camera. So its just pulled into really long pieces, braided and shoved into labled bags. Now, the medical cotton seemed like a much better idea then it atcually was. The fibers are shorter then I had expected. Now, I take a bunch of pills, adn the ones that I purchase in bottles (not the prescriptions ones) come in bottles stuffed with this sterile medical cotton. And the fibers aree really soft and long, easily drafted nad very nice. So I’ve often thought that medical cotton would be great to spin. When I saw the very cheap ($8.50 total for over 1.8lb of medical cotton, including shipping) stuff on ebay, I jumped. And I defintily jumped too soon!

I am also expecting several boxes of fleece I have ordered through ebay,a nd I realized (post) that perhaps that wasn’t the best idea. I know tht Sandy has wonderful fleeces, and I love to support a rescue farm. And I don’t really know if the fleeces on ebay are what people say, if the yhave bugs, or dandruf, or even if they’re string enough or well skirted, or have dung tags. And of course NONE of the fiber has come so far, which just ups the anxiety. And I really shouldn’t have purchased them. Oh, and did I meantion that I just bid on yet another bag of fleece, even though I should be getting around 8lb already. So yah, I’m really smart. And short on money. Anyone want some soon to be washed fresh sheeps fleece? Will be a very reasonable price! IE, basicallly fleece cost and shipping costs.

All of my professors have suddenly decided that we need to do large very labor intensive projects, and of course htye’re due this friday-saterday or monday. So instead of doing this I should be doing soemthing productive. And of course I feel really crappy, I’m coming down with

A) nasty cold

B) the flu

C) Another very nasty bought of depression (which was lifting)

D) a psychotic break or

F) all of the above.

On the fiber front I actually dyed some fiber, after digging through a load of winter storage to get the the white undyed top I purchased. And I dyed some icicle (sparkly stuff) which is so pretty and so fun!!!!!!!!!

I gifted a crocheter who makes losts of felted bags, is in my drawing and 2-d class, and is looking to start her own buisness with these three skeins (not all pic’d)

I call it “Purple Candy Swirl” its a very bulky 3-ply of hand dyed (bady, by me) pencil roving. 100% wool, organic until I dyed it. Its going to really felt very well! Particularly as its already partially felted! The recipient was very happy and kept asking how much it was ($). Of course I haven’t worked out that equation yet.

Spinning:

 This is about 600m of 2-ply lace weight. It is 70/30 Fawn Alpaca/Tussah silk. The roving was purchased from [Halcyon Yarns] (http://www.halcyonyarn.com/index.html) however you can purchase it from almost any fiber store. Its one of those staples like merino roving and 100% wool roving. Something EVERYONE has, and if the ydon’t have it, well give them a few months and they will. It was OMG!!!!!!!!!! So soft and lvoely and snuggly! I admored spinning it. I do with that I had used like a bowl or something to hold the fiebr as I was spinning as I did lose a bit due to stickage to my cloths and stuff. But dreamy! Mum happens to ask me every chance she gets who I’m giving it to (*hint, hint, hint*). I’m not giving it to anyone, I lvoe it so! But I may let her knit something nice from it. Maybe a lovely lace shawl! Pure heaven! called “Silken Fawn” not very creative, but very acurate!

 This is “Spring Bud”, and the larger skein. 429 meters for this skein, 28 m for the mini navajo ply skein. Its very loft and my first “true” three ply. I don’t count the “Purple Candy Swirl” just because and I don’t coild navajo ply as its one strand make into three, not three strands to start with. Although I adore navajo plying! So fun! Anyway, the roving was 100% wool roving purchased from Eco Farm at the Spa in Freeport Maine this year. It was full of VM (vegtable matter) and shorter noils, neps and fiber chunks. So that was a pain. I did manage to spin it very fine and do the three ply for either light fingering weight or even lace weight. Which is very cool! Oh, did I meantion that it was green? 😉

Ignore the lip gloss, it was to keep the pic from turning yellow. This is a 2-ply light finger-lace weight yarn. I handspu nit. Its polypay and on its way to becoming a baby sweater. I handwashed the polypay locks from Sandy, handcarded them on a rented drum carder and then tore the batts into chuncks an rolled those into rologs (one is pic’d in the pic). It was spun mostly woolen style (a first). Very soft and totally lofty! I love it! And I love spinning polypay! I do have to say the one batt I spun worsted style was very hard (stipped into roving). Once I switched to woolen it was so much easier and nicer! I had hoped to maek it a three ply, but that didn’t work out. Maybe with the rest of th batts. I only spun about 1/2 of them for the baby yarn. (this is only the last skein, not reskeined, just fulled).

  This is the roving of grey llama, marron merino and red firestar. It became this:

 “Mixed Doubles” Same name I gave the roving. It was a thicker single ply’d with a beaded gold thread with black eyelash/fun fur thrown in every so often and marron/black/multi-colored ladder novelty yarn thrown in as well. Its very cool! 138 meters.

 This is a handcarded batt of handdyed BFL and soy silk with a little white icicle. 50/50 BFL/Soysilk.

 It becamse a thick and thin single ply’d with a Japanesse novelty yarn. I purchased the novelt yyarn years ago in amden Maine. It is actually 2 strandes. 1, all white with little white flags. The other a white thread with white thread coming off as flags and little dots of color in the white flags. I ended up msotly coiling the two together and the nvoelty yarn totally shows through. I had meant to do occasional behives to cover the novelty yarn completely, but that only worked once. It is super soft and totally fun. I call it “Green Clown Confetti” 104 meters.

 This is the left over from my spinning. When I ran out of the novelty yarn. I broke off the thick and thin single and ended up coiling it around crochet cotton. My first “real” coil. About 9 meters. Its very fun and will be great for a fringe or something like that. Bad pic, but very soft!

 These are the ing’s I gatehred to spin an art yarn. Almsot all fothe fiber is from Sandy. I flicked the brown romney locks (and spun them all from the butt end). I flicked most of the yellow (eye poppin’) merino x locks, and tried to spin those from the butt end. The rest of the locks were too short or tangles so I fluffed those up. The lilac Jacob locks I just fluffed up. Their are also picked white cooridale locks (I didn’t like them picked. They seemed very tangled  ratehr then open). I fluffed up the white cotswold locks (and fluffed in the white icicle). I fluffed up commercially dyed mohair locks I already had (purples, blues, greens, and pinks) and fluffed throug ha little blue sparkle stuff. I nthe end I ended up fluffing the cooridale locks together with some easter grass (pink, clear, sparkly, dark and light green) as well as fluffed the fluffed merino x in with it.

 This is “Nuclear Trash” o nthe niddy noddy. It is a two ply. I don’t know the meterage as I haven’t set teh twist yet. I spun mostly a fine single of the ing’s (2 bobbins, fairly even amount). In the end I just sort of threw the corridale, merino and easter grass at the wheel and shoved it onto the bobbin. Then I ply’d the two bobbins andf I LOVE the ayrn! Its so fun, and very different! I love the mohair locks ply’s with the cotswold locks. And I LOVE spinning cotswold locks. They’re sort of a cross between mohair locks and Suri alpaca locks. So soft, shinny and nice! AGAIN, IT WAS LOADS OF FUN. I also had help doing the spinning, for the first time!

 She only chewed through one pf the singles once. And yes, it is way too hard to pet a cat, treadle, spin a single and take a pic at the same time. So don’t expect it to be purrfect! And, Bruiser even put up the the treadeling. Which was kind of liek me continually kneeing her from one side and then the other. What a love!

 She was much more help when it came to plying. She contributed a little hair, didn’t chew through the yarn. And just snuggled on my lap.

So, I am off to actually get to work on my many projects. I am not looking forward to it! All I really want to do is sleep, read, spin and not worry about doing projects that I don’t understand, will get a bad grade on and end up spending days ratehr then hours on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HELP!

 

Guin



So I went to art class this afternoon, and knew that afterwords I’d need to get gas for the car and groceries for the tummies.

Now, I had meant to get up semi early, go to Augusta and sign up for the sumemr classes, get gas and groceries and find a hair salon place to dye poart of my hair  green. Well of course all I managed to do was pop some frozen waffles into the toaster oven, re-email a paper to my dad for crrection and fall back into bed to sleep. My Mum woke me up just in time to leave for my art class (3:30pm to leave) and there I went.

I brough my latest art piece from drawing and got Pats opinion and tips on how to fix part of it. I chatted with the other people there, tried to convince Pat she should write an art book. And then left.

And I convinced myself I HAD to haev green hair. Now, the one salon I really like doesn’t dye hair anything but natural colors. So no blues, greens, or anything like that. Sure, it can have a bit of a green shade, but hardly that.

So, I park on the street, something I HATE! just because I saw an open sign on a salon door. Now, I’ve already stopped at one salon and it was closed. So this is my second one today. I have to know yo enter as they’ve locked the door, apparently the wind kept blowing it open. I ask the guy if he’s still open, there aren’t any signs telling the hours. He says “maybe, what do you want?”

I explain that I’d like to have part of my hair dyed green.

He immedeatly sands up straighter, acesses my hair, which hasn’t been washed for three days and is pulled back into a messy pony tail with bits falling out. Then he frowns slightly, tells me that my hair is gorgous and he wouldn’t do a thing to it. He thinks about it a little, and can’t decide if he’s have to bleach my hair or not. Then tells me its gorgous as is, and he wouldn’t touch it. Condesendingly he adds that the salon down the street soemtimes does “those crazy colors”

So, now I walk down the street for a few blocks (already having walked 2 blocks to get to the shop). I walk and walk, and walk fighting the wind all teh way. I get into the store, which has an open sign up, but the hours sign says that they’re closed. SO I ask them, same as above.

They can’t decide if they’d have to bleach my hair either, and debate about that and weather either of them wants to take another customer. Now, their are two stylists and each of them are working on a customer. When they find out I want green they shut down, frown and tell me condisendingly that they don’t carry that color.

What the heck! Now, the first place I could kind of understand, it had that older, 40’s+ feel. They guy who was the stylist was clearly older and very into the classic looks and feels. But seriously, isn’t teh customer always right? I mean I want green hair, AND I’m willing to pay someone to dye my hair green. They could dye it Any way they like, in streaks, bloaches, multiple shades. Whatever! Aren’t they supposed to be like “Yah!!!” and have fun? They always do when I tell them they can cut my hair however they want.

Now, I have shopped for green hair dye at several pharmacies and drug stores, and at three different groccery stores. None have it!!!! One had blue. And they all had red, and 2 had something that might be considered purple. But no green at all! I am so sick of looking at Sun-In and all that stuff.

But, I presist, I remembered that their is  Sally’s in a new strip mall near the free way. So I stopped there (I also needed to turn around so taht I could get gas on the other side of the street, and their is no way to turn left without diving head first into traffic). And they had green dye!!!!! They were helpful and kind of excited! They were out of the nice green dye, but they did have it! Three kinds actually. The preminant green was all gone. They had a temporary green that would immedeatly wash out and a spray in neon green that’s supposed to last for a few washes. Of course I got it, its brigh and green and cool. (and the two girls there also had to debate weather my hair needed to be bleached!)  I used up the whole can trying to spray streaks in my hair, and only managed to do about half my head. But that’s okay. It’s clearly meant for someone just spraying a little on the surface of their hair, not “dyeing” streaks. And its also clearly soemthing you do with your girlfriend. Too bad I don’t have any to help me with this.

But I am so excited, and slightly high from the fumes, I have green hair!!!!!!! I have no idea how it really looks, but thats okay. Its freaking green!

My Mum is going to hate it, but thats fine. Sure, it will make me feel aweful, and I’ll resent her and possibly cry. But whatever, I have green hair!

 So,  as I said I know its a complement, my hair is apparently great and gorgous as is. But if I’m not happy with it what’s the point of someone else telling me tehy won’t change it. Isn’t the principle of a stylist to give the customer something stylish, good looking and something that the customer wants? I mean seriously, they’re payign the money for the service. You’re supposed to help them, not say green hair is stupid and I won’t do it.

Seriously, get over yourself man.

Green is the newest, new color. And I totally rock! At least from my point of veiw. And isn’t that the view that matters?



Like at 1:22am, or last night at 2 and then 3 am respectivly. (I was lying in bed trying to sleep, and feeling really bad about skipping a class, my first class to ever do that.)

Why do I always think of quisi-brilliant posts when I’d driving home from somewhere?

And why does my head hurt so much lately? Its a headache! Doesn’t it know that its supposed to go away eventually. And sooner ratehr then latter eventually.

 Why do books published in the 50’s, 60’s and even 70’s always seem to fall apart while you’re reading them? And when they do fall apart why do they always hit you in the nose?

Why do I never have enough time, but at the same time have too much of it?

Why am I addicted to this aweful game. Why does it make me groan and skrech when I mess up?

http://www.digyourowngrave.com/obnoxius-2/

And why is this game fun? Why much I build a building? And why do I think about it at 2:30 am and try and coem up wi th a stratagy between thinking up blog posts?

http://www.digyourowngrave.com/insurgo/

 Why didn’t I listen to my teacher and find a photo that wazs meaningful to me? Why didn’t I do something edgy and cool rather then soemthing elagant and rather standard?

Meet my birthday card project for 2-D design. It was to be made in black and white with the color of your choice, you could do any shade of that color. You also needed to input an image. Otherwise we could do whatever we wanted with photoshop.

birthday card

Perhaps this assignment was so uninspiring to me because I never had good birthday’s. They were usually dull, quick and without meaning. The few that had meaning were full of bad memories and probubly latent hostility.

Why is this game so interesting? Is it because its black and white? Or because it requires thinking? http://www.digyourowngrave.com/shift/

And why after that game much I play this game (but only if I one Shift)

http://www.digyourowngrave.com/shift-2/

Why is this post full of games? Am I going to get someone else hooked? I know that I’ve gotten my Dad hooked on Bloons Tower Defense Game 2. Which I already blogged about. Now I never know if he’ll be playing any of the three levels of that game, spider solitair (which I also taught and got him hooked on), Snood or Snood Towers (of the two I only hooked him on the later), or if he’ll be playing the requisit game of hearts on the computer or the bridge computer game he bought.

Why does he always actually start to work on his homework when someone else needs the computer? Why do I always actually get to work when someone else needs or wants the computer?

Why can’t clean laundy put itself away? And why in the word is clean laundry so attarcted to the floor that it insists on jumping onto the floor and instantly becomeing dirty?

Another why? Why do these two games seem so fun and easy, but in reality happen to be challenging (and fun before challenging) and why do they insist on being played?

http://www.digyourowngrave.com/contour/

http://www.digyourowngrave.com/follis/

Why did I stay up until 12:20 finishing a paper that’s due tomarrow? And why did that paper involve looking at 4 library web sites, comparing ad contrasting them as well as evaluating them? And why when I’m writting something do I usually haev a voice and even personality that shines through? Why can’t I just write a semi-research paper and have it clear consis and to the point. Why must my opinions and thoughts invade everything I do?

Why in the world do those dump pop up email things annoy the heck out of me?

And last of all, why much I play one of those dumb games before going to sleep. Even though my thumb is sore from all the typing (I swear I’m holding it strange. But it makes sense when I’m doing it.). And why dn’t I just go to sleep, I need and want it. There is nothing stopping me!

Oh, and why do I want Holly to win America’s next Supermodel. I don’t even know why I like her. I think its because when the show started she had a memorable hair cut, so I could remember and pick her out. I do think she’s a good model. Perhaps not this week, but defintily the other weeks.

Why does Ronnie bug the hell out of me. He used to be one of my fav’s. But now he seems to be a cocky ass. I liked that sweet clean cut guy. I wanted him to win. Yah, his pics when he’s not the clean cut American guy are generally better. But his attitude and actions are so much worse!

 Guin



I have trouble sleeping. Most specifically falling asleep.

I’ve been of meds, good and bad to help with the sleep. Including what appears (by way of TV) to be the hottest new drug Ambien CR. I was on it several years ago and after a few days it didn’t do anything for me. I think a year later I finally stopped taking it because it just wasn’t doing anything, and why take a drug that isn’t doing you any good?

I’ve tried herbal remedies and supplements. And so far the very best one has been liquid melatonine from “Natrol”. It really, really, really helps alot.

So why not take it now and get to sleep (its 1:57 am)? Because the bottle is empty. And the store that carried them (which was literally on the other side of the state) is closed-permenatly.

Sure, I have several bottles of the same brand of Melatonin in 3mg pills. Why 3mg instead of the 1mg you tried and found to be helpful? Well because you were so excited to find it you bought several bottles without thinking to see if they were any different from the first brand.

And for whatever reason the 3mg pills do not cut very well, they just crumble up and end up a mess. If I take the whole pill then I end up sleeping about 4 hours more then I need or want to.

Plus, due to the bad depression  I spoke of earlier the drug I was on changed.

When I went on the drug it was both an experiement to see if it would work, and work well instead of making me worse, and to see if the side effect would be good.

Now, there are several side effects. #1 would be a penchant for causing liver failure, thus every six months I get to have blood tests (fasting blood tests!) to make sure that it hasn’t started to shut down. And among the myriad of other things I cannot remember it also causes sleepyness. Which is really great! I took it at night and it helped. The first few months it literally nocked me out. And slowly since then its stopped working as well, but it still did help with sleep.

Well, with the depression I’ve changed both amounts of the drug and the type of drug. But its the same drug…. basically. Now its time released instead of all going into affect at once. And thats a good thing. It means I get a more constant and consistant supply of the chemicals. I’m less likely to experience mood swings, and I don’t have to take the pills at certain times, so many times a day.

Unfortunatly the down side is that with the increase of the medication the nearve receptors that were hit with the drug at a lower dose aren’t hit anymore, and I don’t experience that nasty side effect of sleepyness.

Which means that I’m a bit screwed. Particularly with my logic being off.

Anyway, back to the logic.

I have this idea in my mind, which I’ve never voiced before. But one thats been there nonetheless.

  • If I stray up really late then I’ll get really tired.
  • If I’m really tired then I’ll fall asleep quickly.
  • If I fall asleep quickly I won’t spend so much time in bed laying awake
  • If I’m asleep I will not be tempted to read in bed to fall asleep.

Now, according to several different doc’s in several different professions you shouldn’t treat your room like a room. It should just be a place to store cloths and sleep. You don’t want to have a television (I don’t, I don’t even have room for one) or anything to distract you from falling asleep. You want it to be a place where you just relax. If you have other stimulous then you will be distracted. In addition you need to treat your bed as a sleeping surface. NEVER do anything but sleep in it. If you need to read or do anything but sleep get up. Otherwise your body will think that the bed is more then jus ta sleeping surface and it will be harder for the body to sleep in the bed.

I of course almost always read in bed. Last night it was the second book in the Forerunner series by Andre Norton. And unfortuantly I cannot remember the name at the moment.

I’ve taken to reading her books (at least the ones that I’ve purchased from used book stores and occasionally when I find them from regular book stores) by when they were first copyrighted. They’re all published in different formats, by different publishers and under different names. I have three of the same book all with different names and two with different publishers, and all with different publication dates. So as I read I find out if they go in a series, or trilogy or whatever. If tehy’re the same book with a different title, or anything like that.

Plus its very easy, I simply pull out the next book and insert the book I just finished reading into the open space. Which works well as her first books from the 50’s-early 90’s appear to be about the same size. In the 90’s and even the late 80’s they started to get bigger. Which in general I prefer. But with Andre Norton, I will take ANY book I can get!

Logic. So, tonight for example I stayed up until 1:57am playing the Sims 2. Both because its fun,a nd because it doesn’t require thinking.

Last night I stayed up until about 2am playing. And of course I stayed up until about 3 something finishing that book in an attempt to fall asleep (after lying in bed trying to sleep for half an hour). I woke up at around 4pm, not good!

I know that my logic is off, that I won’t fall asleep faster if I stay up latter. I know that I need to go to sleep early so tha tI’ll wake up early.

But its just no fun to go to bed early and lie in bed trying to fall asleep. I can ususally manage a few hours before I finally give in and get a book. And then I read until I cannot keep my eyes open any more.

So, what’s wrong with me? Why can’t  change?

I just cannot help but wondering…..



Count me OUT!!!!!!!!! Way, way, way, really far out! I want absolutly nothing to do with them! They are evil, grotesque and incredibly cruel!

What would I say that?

Because that’s how I feel!

Why do I feel that way?

Because one of my two classes a week professors is the king, no, rather the emperor of them! Which makes the class rather hellish!

So, I have two online classes and two classes that meet twice a week on campus. Both classes are 3 hour long art classes which involve a fair amount or work. But mostly repetition, which gets dull after a while.

For example, B-Cat (who teaches the drawing 1 class I’m in) is NEVER consistant. I swear he must take drugs AND say to himself every morning and night “I will not be consistant! I will not be consistant!”

Okay, so back tracking a little.

I have in general had really bad luck with art teachers. They either disliked me, I didn’t get along with them, or they were gross, stupid, illinformed and didn’t know what they were doing, or in their own little world.

However, I have always done really, really, really well at art. Its come very easily to me, and quickly. I’m better and worse at different things. For example, I cannot for the very life of me manage to make good pottery, but I can do really wonderful watercolors. I just love getting the right tint, and shading. Using the water the pull the pain around, or the opposite.

In grade school I went to ER Art once a week. (ER, standing for Enriched Resource) and got to try all kinds of different art types and techniques. It was so much fun, and I was rather good at it too. I was used to being good at it, I did it alot, and I mean ALOT. And it was my talent. It helped make up for the fact that not only didn’t I understand sports, but I sucked at them. I was the last person anyone wanted to work with, for anything. But particularly gym, sports and maths.

In middle school I was also in ER ART. But this time instead of meeting once a week in the widest hallway (there literally wasn’t anywhere else to meet) during my lunch and recess break (who needs to eat when you can do art. And it was really, really nice to escape from recess. As far as I was concerned it was just a form of ourture lkike gym.)

We met in the art room, there was actually an art room. It was so amazing, and it was the first time I relized that different classes could and should have their own room, and their own supplies and specialized equipment. (It was also when I learned that I had asolutly no talent for 3-d art. Pottery- I still hate you!)

In middle school were were one a 5 day schedual. Day 1 was the first day of school, and it cycled through day 1-5. If we had a snow day, or vacation you simply started where you left off. So for Spring break we might end on day 3, then when school started again it would be day 4.

So, we met on days 2 and 4 in 7th grade. In 8th grade we met on days 1, 3, and 5. Which was awesome, to meet two days in a row! And it worked out great for me. See the other thing I was really good at was reading. And accourding to their placement test for reading I was way up there in the seniors of high school, college level. So for a while they tried to stick me in with one of the reading classes (those met first period of every day), but I was to good. Okay, I was too good. It was too easy, but I never said anything, never acted out or anything. I just went along with it. I got sick alot and missed alot of school, blah, blah, blah and they moved me out of the advanced reading class into the “super advanced reading class”. AKA the class where one of the teachers help a kind of study hall. See, the really, really smart kids who had other ER classes also had their reading class through ER, so during that first period of the day they had study hall. The teacher gave me a sheet of paper listing different genre’s. Said read a book for each genre and write a report. I went way into detail and wrote these really long reports, I hadn’t ever written one before and I had no guildines. He yelled at me and told me he just wanted a paragraph. He also really liked to yell at me and tell me I was reading way below my level.

I mean come on, I read anything I could get my hands on. I hardly knew what a genre was, and the only ones I knew about were historical fiction, mysteries, biographies, and the like. I couldn’t tell the difference between fiction and non-fiction, and I had never heard of science fiction or fantasy. (which by the way are very different things despite being lumped together.)

Anyway, other then I didn’t know anything it was a great class. I got to read and no one bothered me, and I got do do art two days a week.

When I was an 8th grader they got smart and just let me have study hall in the hall with two other ER art students (who were also in all the other ER classes).

So, I had the art classes, lots nad lots of them. And I was really scared of the teacher as she yelled at me the very first day we had class. But by the time school ended she was my favotire teacher, or course she was also the only reasonable, nice and sane teacher. All of “us” ER art students would hang out in her classroom working on projects, doing art and fooling around during most of our afetrnoon study halls. It was really nice, and alot of fun. It was also one of the few times I had “freinds” to be around.

Can you tell I’m not only a social misfit, but particularly when I was younger I was very shy. I just didn’t know how to react around people.

Anyway, back to the subject.

In highschool I was disapointed, I didn’t have time to take any art classes my first year, but the second year I took 3 classes. Pottery (Yes, it just confirmened that I in no way can make pottery!) and printmaking (I cannot do that either!) were each a semester, or half a year long. I also had the generic art class. Which was alot of drawing, a littler papermache (I did an oragami crane), even less painting and again, alot of drawing and shape making.

So, printmaking was dull and annoying. The teacher was so strange. He loved to talk about being in the peace corps, how he owned a maple sugar stand (and made the syrup, I have made sure to NEVER buy his brand!), and how great and wonderful the army was! (This would also be the year after 9/11). he was the strangest combination of liberal and staunch conservative. The class was long and dull. I was okay at making the design and conceptualising it. But for whatever reason he kept messing up some fo the transpherance of a design via a light sensative meterial. Because of that even though I tapped the screen profusly!!!!!!!! it just never worked and it leaked EVERYWHERE. I was really bad at the whole wood cutting thing. And all of the other printmaking techniques. Surprisingly he always held my artwork up as an example (even after I wasn’t at the school anymore. I know because my Mum (a music teacher in the district) saw the print hanging up two years AFTER I was at the school. She stole it and brought it home. I prefered not to even think about it!

The art class and the pottery class were both taught by the came women. Who I swear never took a bath or shower, or washed or even brushed her hair! She loved to talk about how she handwashed all of her cloths and prefers not to use electricity. The art class was cool. We worked with some different mediums. I learned that I really liked China Markers (although I haven’t used them since). We did alot of different and sometimes crazy stuff. And I was really, really good at shading, creating textures and drawing. My artwork was ALWAYS the example, put up for display or both. And I can honestly say several times I would be looking at this really amazing artwork she was holding up as an example. Only when I literally saw my name at the bottom would I realize that it was my artwork.

We’ll not think about pottery, disaster would be a good word. If there is such a word.

Basically I came into my own of art in high school. I also got really sick and ended up dropping out and not really doing alot of art. Sure, I still go the the Friday afternoon art class I’ve taken since I was 7 (I’m 21 now).

I’ll admit that my art skills ahev gotten a bit rusty, and sometimes it dows take a space to remember how to used different mediums, or learn for the first time.

But this man! He said the very first class that he didn’t like to lecture (half and hour latter). Well now we can expect at least 30 minutes of lecture to start with, and plenty for during the class.

And then he sayd one thing, then changes his mind, or forgets and changes his mind. And he doesn’t admit it. I know most of us in the class have spent wasy more money then we never needed to ahev spent. I didn’t need to spend $50 on Sharpies, which he named b brand and type. I could ahve just spent the $20 to get the pens that he really wanted us to get but didn’t say until the second class. So, $50+$20= $70 spent. $50 of which never should have been spent in the first place! And tha twas only the start, and its still happening.

When he lectures he doesn’t say anything new, which would be understandable and possibly helpful. No. B-cat has to say exactly the same things he said the first class. Which is really, really boring! Today I couldn’t even look semi bored, I absolutly know that my face had started to look resentful.

Now, until now in the class my drawings have usually been in the “wow” “thats  really good” “see how this person…..”.

So, okay. We’re finally off contour line drawings (which were okay the first month, but this is the third month of them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), and we’re onto charcoal and drawing, or rahter shading the shadows in. We aren’t allowed to draw lines now.

And of course I need to lines to give me a sense of direction, tell me where I am, and stop me from creating soemthing completely out of preportion.

Anyway, he walks around looking at everyones drawing and tells me that this particular part is “really very good” “you have wonderful texture”, and do the rest like that.

Well then he keeps coming back and yelling at me because I changed by style. The little top bit doesn’t match the rest of the drawing. And he keeps nagging on me and telling me how terrible it is. He holds it up to show everyone how important consistancy it!

I mean WHAT THE F*CK!!!!!!

You freaking say one thing and literally by the time he goes around the room again not only have I and my drawing become evil, but he needs to hammer it home.

Not only that but we have to take this drawing home and finish it. We have to use the space left in the drawing to create anoither still life that blends seemlessly into the other drawing.

Not only that, another time around he holds my drawing up and says how great it is taht I’m doing shading around the objects. That I’m adding depth and background so that they stick out. Only half a cicute of the room and he’s back yelling about how terrible it is. How it dosn’t match the rest of the drawing. (well it did, the newer parts of the drawing, the parts he origionally wanted me to do). I then “fix it”. 10 minutes later he comes back and not only yells because I fixed it too quickly and didn’t take enough time with it. But its also all of the things he had just said he wanted!

Now, I’m not too happy about the pic to start with, I was having trouble finding the way I liked working with the charcole, and getting it to do what he wasnted us to do with it. So I am really not happy and I have to try and find a way to “fix” the pic.

 So I fricking hate B-cat! Not only is he inconsistant, but he’s rude, stupid and dumb. And so far EVERYONE I have talked to concures. My goodness man, make up your mind and stick to it!!!!!!!

Now, I’ve always known from an earily age that I wasn’t creating art in the classes for myself (okay, highschool really. And grade school, but I didn’t realize it then). I was creating what the teacher wanted to see. They didn’t want to see what we saw, or created. They wanted to see something that fit their ideas and their images.

But I hadn’t really noticed it too much from B-cat before. Or maybe I’d been ignoring it. And also, I really don’t want to go back to making art for someone else. I prefer making art to explore, experiement and try soemthing new. I don’t like sticking with the same old thing, I like adding twists, turns and doing things differently.

For example, I am so sick of still lives!!!!!!!!!! I mean really sick!!!!! And we only ever do still lives of the same dull spray painted white plastic juice jugs and wine bottles. Trust me, three months, very dull! So, what am I doing in my Friday afternoon art class? Why I’m doing a still life. On Bristol board (which I’ve never really worked in before), and I am using a different medium for every object or part of the still life. The wine glass and the wine bottle will be in water color, the background is in acrylic. The label on the wine bottle will be guache and the straw holder or bottom of the wine bottle will be in pen and ink. The grapes are going to be in soft pastel, the apple will be in oil pastels, the pomagranite will be in colored pencil and I’dd not really sure about the lemon or the cloth. Perhaps ebony pencil for the cloth and china markers for the lemon.

Anyway. Just incase you didn’t understand it before. I really, really, REALLY HATE B-cat!!!!!!!! He’s an annoying bastard as far as I am concerned!

 But I suppose thats life, college, school and otherwise.

Live well,

Guin



Yah right!

Meds help, I know that for a fact, but they can also hurt you. And the dumb TV add with that line, well I’ve either taken those drugs, or am currently on them.

Depression does hurt, physically, mentally and emotionally! There are different stages and levels of depression. Its a wide spread condition that EVERYONE suffers from, to some extent.

Therapy can help people to deal with there depression, or face whaetevr is depressing them so that it no longer depresses them. Or therapy can help a person in general with themselves and depression or other conditions.

Drugs can help, in different ways. But they can also make things worse. I know. Some of those damn drugs put me into a basically emotional and psychological coma. Not nice at all!

The FDA tests drugs, or hires people to test them. But the people in the FDA are basically controlled by the drug companies. The start by working in a drug companey and because of that experieince they are ideal to be hired by the FDA, or the other way around. But however yopu slice it they are controlled by the drug companies. And even though there are warnings cited in commercials, ad’s and by the doc’s you need to be careful. Some doc’s are out there for thmselves, or for the money or even the drug companey. They aren’t with you 24/7, and they cannot read your mind. We all hold things back, things we don’t tell the doc’s or other people. So be careful.

Drugs can be very good. I know, the ones I’m on help keep me functioning. They don’t stop me from feeling depressed, and even from having major depressed epsiodes. But they help me deal with the depression and anxiety. They also slow down the progression of the depression and anxiety. Not stop it, but slow it down so that I notice it and can start to combat it. Unfortunatly soemtimes depression just happens. Like now.

I didn’t notice I was becoming depression until I suddenly realized that things aren’t really making me happy, I’m not really enjoying things. I need to snuggle cats and have people tell me they like me to feel better. I’m always tired and usually hungry. But I don’t have enough energy to actually make anything. So ice cream, chocolate truffles I made a while ago, frozen food, bagel’s, toast and cereal are basically stables of my diet. Not very healthy, but reality.

Anyway, mini rant over!

I interveiwed for my first job. Or rather I interveiwed for my first job in a chain store or retail store. At Target which opens on March 8-9th this year. So, that was Friday and I can expect to hear back from them if they hired me on Monday or Tuesday.

I was excited, it would be a job, a way to make money. Hopefully gain experience and have SOMETHING to put onto an application. I’m 21 for goodness sakes, people don’t like that I’ve never worked. Most people look down on me as lazy, stupid or spoiled. Wehn I’m none of the above, they don’t know anything about me. But they all judge me.

I live in the country! There are no stores in walking distance. And when I was younger I couldn’t drive. When I was old enough to do drivers ed I was busy doing dance and art lessons, and doing school. Then I got sick and dropped out of school because that school…… Moving on. I’ve only had a liscense for a year, I still battle my illness (which is mostly severe depression manifested in physical ways, or at least thats what I beleive the good therapist beleives) AND go to school full time. And work at my school work, I do not want to just glide by, I want to do very well or excelle at what I learn and do!

I just don’t undertsand why people beleive that they have the right to judge me when they know nothing about me, my history or anything!

Anyway, I have finished knitting a berat (hat) for my Mum, which she never thanked me for. Only complained and nit picked about. When I ge tthe guts to call her on it she claims that she doesn’t do that, and that she hurts alot and I need to do everything she wants. (She was in a small car accident) Yes, in different words. But those are the basical and persistant ideas.

Now “A Loose Knit Group” is doing socks for the month of March. Which is new, excit8ng and daunting. But I had never knit a hat or a pair of gloves (fingerless) before. So I’m sure I can do it. I just need to get enough time. A good and simple pattern. And of course find good yarn- preferably homespun.

The two projects on the needles are bags. One is going to be a felted bag. I just want to knit some pockets and sew them on before the bag is felted, and knit the handles for the felting.

The other bag is completely my own pattern. Not felted and ratehr a mish-mash. And s far I’ve probubly spent around 65-75 US dollars on it. Which is alot of money, and soemthing I never meant to do.

So I got out of a class early and had about 4 hours to kill, so I went to Barns and Nobles to find a good knit pattern in a book to buy, then I’d go next door to Micheals and buy some yarn and a pair of needles.

Of course I didn’t get any book as I couldn’t find any patterns I liked. And I didn’t look at the books I knew my Mum had. So I just decided to make up the pattern as I went along.

You know, buy some yarn and knit it like it wants to be knitted.

Of course I had gotten the idea that I wanted trim from on of the patterns in one of the many books. So I went and found cool trims, choose one and decided to go off that.

Its all blue, with a light blue ribbon as a base and lots of round colorful blue sequins handing off it. So I choose 4 different yarns that matched colors in the trim. A pair of needles along with a cable needle (I knew I would knit the bottom band first, and I wanted to have a cable on the bottom) and several strands of beads that also went with the trim.

I also applied through a computer system at Target during that time. And still had over an hour to kill before class started. But enough time to start the base band.

I btought everything with me to the class room (its empty the hour before my class and I’d rather sit in a heated builing then in a cold car), layed it out on the artists bench I was siting on and sketched what I wanted to bag to look like. And if I had a scanner I would scan in the color sketch I did at home. But alas, no scanner!

On alother note, I left early for class on Wensday, it was snowing and we had had a late start. However I misread the clock so I was an 2 hours early. So I went back to Barns and Nobles and did what I wish I had done to start with. Just bought a book. Much less expensive then purchasing loads of stuff.

I got Intertwines by Lexi Boeger. Which was really good. Although I think I would have enjoyed Pluckyfluff Handspun Revolution more. Howeever Barnes and Nobles had three spinning books, counting Intertwined. One was Teach Yourself Visually to Handspin, which I had alreayd purchased from them, and a book about high whorl drop spindle spinning.

I guess what I really want are books which will show and each me different ways  to spin and give me some history and tips and tricks. I’m not a huge fan of books with patterns, as I rarely follow patterns. And even when I do follow patterns I don’t, I change them. I prefer to make soemthing up as I go along. Have a basic idea in mind, know what I wanr to happen. But not follow any set rules or guidelines.

Anyway, the book is very good. I love how she does her patterns. Basicallt a sketch and then by feel and by yarn.

The techniques were interesting, but I’d already read about them elsewhere on the internet. Not that its not nice to be able to quickly find them instead of rememebr them. And have better pics. I just would have liked soemthing different.

However what I really loved, and what made the book worth getting (at least to me) was the “Nozzlers” Page 52. Chapter 3. Free the Pattern!: The Yarn made me do it. And I have been so itching to make a nozzler.

Now, you have to understand that up until this point I’ve thought them to be ugly, stupid and expenisive. However the story to go with them, or the explination is highly enteraining, well written, and defintily has me hooked. Tehy seem so fun, creative and different.

And yes, I would tell you wouldn’t buy the book. And frankly I’m not in the mood to synthesize a wonderful indea into a few terse sentences.

I wish I was at the wheel doing this right now! But I don’t really have time! Time, soemthing I lack so much of. Anyway, on the wheel is some green wool I purchased from Spa, knit and spin weekened in Freeport. Its alright. A wondeful green and has plenty ofbody. However I prefer softer longer fibers. So why did I get the fiber. It was the correct price, $2 an ounce. And I had $18 left. I do have to admite that I got 4oz f this fiber, and there really waas alot of it. I never cease to be amazed how much fiber 1 oz can be.

It was great seeing all kinds of fiber people. But I do have to say, every single stand I went into did one of two things. (or the owners of the stand). They ignored me since I am abviously a college kid, I’m not there with a parent so I obviously don’t have any money to buy fiber, or any real interest in fiber. Do you haev any idea hot hard it is to get someones attention when they are deliberatly ignoring you. Even when you are the only person in the stand and they are looking right at you! Incredibly hard!

And if they weren’t doing that they were following me around very closly (I stepped on one person, although I don;t know if I did it on purpose or not), constantly talk down to me (yes down), repeat themsles repeatedly and treat me as if I am going to shop lift that pound of fiber infront of the cash register.

Needless to say it wasn;’t a very pleaset expierience. Althought  I will say that Spunky Eclectic (Amy) was the excetion. She smiles and said “Hi” when I walked past, she was very nice. And I would have loved to have explroed her stand and purchased fiber. But I know I can go down to her store anytime (driving distance baby!). I really go to the fiber fairs to find new things, good prices (fiber can be damn expensive!), and all that jazz. I know one time I found the Jacquace acid dyes that I use and love. This time I got almost a pound of nice (clean, shiny and untangled and un greasy) mohair locks. Which I cannot wait to spin into a Nozzler! (Although when I purchased them I hadn’t even gotten the book yet, and not all will go into the Nozzler!)

I have finally made an appointment for a hair cut on Tuesday. Its been almsot a year since my last one. And, much to my Mum’s horror (No I’m not telling her before hand!) I think I’m going to get them to dye a few of my curls green! Think deep emerald green.

This is what my hair looked like after my hair cut. All light blond and curly! (this is taken from the udnerside of my hair out!

hair-5.jpg

And this is the last fiber I spun before I started onteh green. It was comercially dyed merino roving which I 2x blended into batts. Then tore off stips and rolled into rologs. And I spun it woollen (I think. Or basically by pulling back with the rolog so losts of air was trapped and no shin) I plied to two singles. (which I had meant to spin from dark to light, but messed up and spun medium, light and then dark). Its came out alright and is dry and sitting on the rack waiting to be reskeined.

comercial-merino-blended.jpg Or you could say meant to spin from redish to blueish.

Anyway. I have finished reading chapter 4 of Legal research and materials. I have several online things I need to do with it, and I hope to actually finish the asignment and test before the due date of this Saterday instead of Saterday night at 11pm.

 Ah well. A batehr and blast of everything and nothing!

Just remember, depression hurts, and you can’t stop that. But you can make it hurt less, or even go away. It just takes alot of work!

Luck and love!

Guin



So, the new semester hass started, I’ve actually had classes. Which was and is very exciting. I think I like my online classes. Definitly the library science class. Its very interesting so far, and i get to interveiw one of my favorite people. Of course I only know them through their blog. But they defintily amuse me, life me up and all that jazz! So, I will be interviewing The Happy Villian (http://ifirantheuniverse.blogspot.com/). It should ber interesting. Or at least I hope it will be.

I can say absolutly that I SUCK at contour line drawings. I did when I was 7 years old, when I was 13 years old and I still do now that I’m 21 years old. I don’t know what I thought would have changed that. I mean I have taken private art classes from the same marvolous person (Pat B) since I was 7, and I have produced some very nice drawings and wonderful paintings. But really, that is absolotuly no reason to think I might be good at soemthing I’ve always sucked at. And of course the professor insists that contour line drawings are the most important thing to be able to do as an artist so well be spending the first few weeks on them. This is going on week 4 now. And there is no end in sight!

On the unther hand I am really enjoying the 2-d design class. Its interesting. And I’ve always liked the idea just lines and shapes can convey things. We rarly think about it that much. We do think of pictures as peaceful, energetic, chaotic and what not. But its interesting to learn why and how and all.

Onto suicide, my car is attempting to commit it. Isabella went into the shop for an oil change and an inspection so I can register or reregister her. $1000 later she’s home. However now she has a bit of a tilt or slight curve to the right. Which isn’t very nice at all!

 I dropped my College Algebra class. I just didn’t have enough time between two art classes (at least 3 hours of homework each) and 2 online classes. However I have kept the book so Dad and I can work on it, and I can take the class this summer. I was sad to drop it, its my first dropped class. And I am no longer a full time student as I need 12 credit hours and I’m only getting 11. One of the online classes in only a two credit class.

 On the spinning front, I have actually been doing it. I finished spinning up this batt:

gladrial-grey-batt-2.jpg

It was purchased from The Enchated Knoll (http://farm-witch.blogspot.com/) at the Common Ground Fair. I really enjoyed spinning it. It was soft and lushious and it didn’t matter that it was a grey because it was so soft and lushious and pretty! However I do have to take issue with the amount of neps and noils in the batt. One whole end was unusable unless I wanted a textured yarn. I wanted a smooth soft yarn.

I purchased two batts and spun 1 batt per bobbin. And of coruse lost the end of one yarn in the bobbin, cut the yarn and lost about half of what I spun. So then I spun up the rest of the batt extra thin (think serious lace thread). And of course ended up having more of that extra fine so I ended up having to andean ply the end of that. Anway, its lovely and very “energized” but will be heavenly once finished.

I took pics of all my batts and roving and everything. And I uploaded everything I could for January onto Flickr. I am very happy that I remembered to upload all 100mgbits r whatever they are. However all I did get up was some spun yarn and bought roving. Which ins’t bad at all. Now I just need to label it all and upload to ravelry, which will be fun but long.

So fiber. I really want to spin a funky and fun yarn for #5 Yarn challenge. You can check out PluckyFluff’s blog (http://pluckyfluff1.livejournal.com/)  the Yarn Museum (http://www.theyarnmuseum.com/). I absolotuly love Holly EQQ’s fibers. And I’ve been through alot of aweful things with docs. Thankfully my parents have always been there and when things started I was still a minor and still in high school, so finances with health have never bothered me. I don’t want to……….. Anyway. “Circle the Wagon” reminds me of the Laura Ingles Wilder books my Dad read to me when I was little. Or those book when indians raid the wagon train and steal the girl with blond hair and raise her as their own. But she escapes or something or other. I can see lots of fades cotton prints and ginham, blue skys and clouds, murky rivers, tin cups and plates, rifles, camp fires and the brown Constantine (?) wagons with the white canvas cover, plus the dusty trails and wide sweaping grass lands.

I’d really love to do a coil yarn, sort of the “gathering round” bit. I think it would be cool to do flames and fire, sort of the campfire with the coiling. But it might be a bit dull. Anyway, I did upload a bunch of possible batts to the photo thing. But its 1:50 am and I’ll get back to that.

Addictions- well I’ve been accused of them. Not like heroin or something like that. No. Not even an intentional addiction. However doc’s did try and blame my health problems on the drugs that THEY prescribed me to help cure or stop the problem. So then they would slowly ween me off the drg so I didn’t have any bad side affects. Of course it turned out the drugs they didn’t like me on helped, and the ones they insisted were perfect and whatever actually hurt me. But whatever. Doc’s can be such asses! Don’t get me wrong I’ve had a few good ones. But for the most part I can unaquivically say they are selfrightious prigs that don’t know anything and don’t listen to the people they are supposed to be helping. Not that I have an opinion or anything! 😉

Onto addictiosn and games. I happen to be both. Now you already know I play EL. And its fun and I love the people,a nd I haven’t had time to play lately. However I did find “Flight of the Hampsters” (http://www.digyourowngrave.com/flight-of-the-hamsters/) from The Yarn Harlots blog (http://www.yarnharlot.ca/blog/). Bad! Not only have I played this by myself (and just got my hightest score yet or 719ft total and 238ft for a single) but with my Dad and my MUM. Yes! With Mum! Which is absolotuly fabulous as she ins’t much of a game person. And additionally I’ve even turned the sound on, it really makes the game more fun.

 So, my warning. It seems like a dumb game, it is. But its also alot of fun once you get the hang of it. Take turns with the family and see who can get the highest score. My tips:

1) Click to hit the hamster with the pillow on his way down.

2) There is more “stuff” in the air closer to the ground. I tend to stay about where the yellow and orange meet in the sky.

3) If the hampster is headed straigh down pray you hit a ball or a spring. Otherwise its the end of the run. He will hit the ground, you cannot pull him out of his dive.

4) The pink balls will bounce, but not very high. The yellow balls bounce much higher.

5) The “Glide meter” is on the top right corner. If full you have that much glide power. It will empty as you hold the mouse key down. It will refill as you just glide or whatever.

6) If you hit a rocket it speads you forward. The spin things either lift you up slightly or send you high into the sky.

7) The skate boards don’t do much. However if you have hit one on the run and then hit the ground (not straight down, more at a skid) and bounce he should pull it out and you will slide a few more feet.

8) Again, its not about gaining hight, more about moving forward. Hit as much “stuff” as you can. Preferably the balls and the rockets.

The other games that have kept me up until 2:04am now? “Bloons Tower Defense 2” (http://www.digyourowngrave.com/bloons-tower-defense-2/). This was loads of fun and I played it for an hour or two tonight with Dad. Neither of us meant to play it. I just wanted to see what it was, and he stopped to see what I was doing.

So, my tips for this game?:

1) Use the Dart Monkey and first to piercing dart and second long range.

2) If you have to use the “spikes” or “monkey glue” then you need to put up more towers.

3) Towers are your friend. They are a long term investamnt. They suck up alot of money to start. But they pay you back loads.

4) Spikes seem like a really good idea, they’re so much cheaper. But they eat up your money before you know soemthing hit you!

5) This is a game of stratagey. Do not be afraid to start over having learned from your mistakes.

6) Put the towers in the corners. And save up for the Cannon towers. They’ll come in handy around the 25th level.

Okay, very strange, ALL of the dogs and animals outside are howling all of a sudden. Its 2:ll am.

I have to go check out whats happening. Night all,

Here’s a pick of Hazel sweet:

picture-242.jpg



et cetera